WHYNATTE

Growing a moustache is like slapping your best friend over the head with a live pompano.  We all want to do it from time to time, but we resist the urge because we’re not sure how such a bold move will be received by the general public.  
Occasionally, we men (and some female employees of [...]

Needless to say that Whynatte is a fan of exotic cat breeding. We own them, we race them, and we deal them. In other words, we are very pleased that someone was kind enough to affix a Whynatte sticker to their brand new Jaguar. We don’t know who this person is, but [...]

Question: What do a insatiable thirst for Whynattes, a half dozen frozen muskrat embryos, and a man named London, have in common?
Answer: They’re all things that Brian brought with him on his recent trip to Atlanta.
Brian is on the far left, and London is second from the right. The frozen embryos are in [...]

Like playing with lasers, sometimes we hate the things we love. For this fellow, his laser happens to exist in the form of a Whynatte.
Why does he hate the Whynatte? Because he had to quit drinking Whynattes for an entire month. His actual medical doctor ordered him not to drink Whynattes for [...]

Animals that use talons to grip prey:
a) Barn Owl
b) Crested Eagle
c) Red-tailed Hawk
d) Michael Walberg
e) All of the Above
The Walberg, one of the hairier genera in the animal kingdom, is seen holding its prey with a standard talon grip:

A rare photo of the entire Walberg clutching its prey:

Some call it indentured servantry, around here we like to call it a summer internship.
Sure, it’s not as prestigious as my own college summer internship at the local squid farm, but Bryan and Lauren have it pretty good working for SneakySunday.com. They are allowed out of their crates between the hours of 9am and [...]

Jenny is about to get married, but her heart is still with another man. Mr. Latte was the best she’d ever had, a unique fellow of refined taste and unlike anyone she had met before. They found each other a few years ago at a local bar, but she had visited him in [...]

Actual quote from an elderly gentleman at the grocery store, upon watching me load 10 gallons of milk into my shopping cart: “Boy, you best off just buy yo’ self a whole cow.” Great point if I didn’t already own six bison.
Actual quote from Andy as we drove the 10 gallons of milk back [...]

a) Gnu auction;
b) Slingblade factory;
c) Whynatte Party:

Now that I have friends with children, I’ve discovered that finding a babysitter is no easy task. There seems to be a surplus of demand, and a shortage of supply. Sure, you can always hire the frisky teenager who lives a few houses down, but kids these days are addicted to meth, and [...]

No doubt that Whynatte is long in the tooth, but this is taking the tooth to the next level. Faded charcoal houndstooth, with a silver foil Whynatte logo. More limited than a handmade viola, this shirt will make you shine.
Available in men’s sizes, and for sale in the Whynatte store. [...]

Imagine waking up to find yourself in a foreign land, where everybody is speaking with a strange tongue, almost as though they’re talking with the twang from the strings of a banjo. Perhaps these people are speaking in “Banjonese,” you think to yourself. Men are wearing thick hair strips across their upper lip, [...]

Once again, it’s time to pray to the latte:

We’ve all done our fair share of “horsing around,” but it’s safe to say that Mike Veeck owns the entire stable. This man is living proof that one can turn outlandish ideas into successful empires, and in the process have a great time doing it. Imagine that.
So who exactly is this “Mike Veeck” [...]

Whynatte is teaming up with Esperanza Clothing to make May 17th a night you will not remember. At all.
More details to follow. For now, put it on your day-timer, and make an appointment to get your hair did.