WHYNATTE

Okay, so we can all admit that when used as a recreational drug, horse tranquilizers make for good edgy fun. Especially when combined with a late night gondola ride through Steamboat Springs, CO. However, if Steamboat Springs is too far out of the way, or you aren’t affluent enough to have your own [...]

Wearing her diamond studded Whynatte shorts, Ja-Shin waits patiently with the crowd for the magical unicorn to come out of its magical unicorn house:

Do like I just did: Print out an 8×10 of this photo, stare incredibly close at it, and for at least thirty minutes, preferably while in the shower, and you can see [...]

Despite the dropping mercury, it’s getting hotter and hotter as the official dropping of the Whynatte Latte approaches in less than a fortnight. If you want my honest opinion, it’s starting to feel like a Choctaw sweat lodge around here. But maybe that’s just the CVS brand NyQuil that I just threw back [...]

I imagine that the bed at the Days Inn in Mountain Grove, MO are approximately as comfortable as I it would be to sleep naked, covered in honey, and strapped to a plank of plywood covered in carpenter ants. Which is to say that I would have rather used an adult porcupine as a [...]

You might say that we’ve been busy putting the “homo” into the “homogenization” out here in Cabool, Missouri. Let’s just say that we didn’t come all the way to Cabool for the nightlife.
There is something very dairy going on here:

I don’t know if this happens to you on a regular basis, but I keep finding planks of wood floating in the lake near my house, carved out in the form of the Virgin Mary. What’s more, and I don’t know if it’s just me, but I keep coming back to my crib to [...]

The story behind these photos is best told by Kate, the slinky blonde in the photos below:
“Lynsey & I went hiking at Tent Rocks in Santa Fe last weekend, wearing our matching Whynatte shirts, of course. I had packed both of mine because I wear these things more often than I wear my own skin…! [...]

So now I have to figure out where I can get a vat of lavender oil large enough to accommodate two Whynatte models. What the fuck am I going to do with the solo vat that I just had installed in our office?

Have you ever thrown a party, and not remembered anything about it? I have. In fact it happened to me less than a week ago. Apparently, I helped to throw a large party featuring three live bands and $5 Whynattes, but I may as well have been rock climbing with Bobby Bonilla [...]

Jennifer thought that she was coming by Whynatte’s international headquarters to audition for a role in our up and coming film How to Lose a Squid in 40 Days. She had eagerly responded to the casting call that we had posted in the Crustacean Times, thinking that this might just be the break she [...]

There are only two different kinds of ticks that I like: The ticks that suck the blood from my doberman, and the ticks of a clock that count down the seconds remaining until the Whynatte Latte rolls off of the assembly line in Springfield, MO. Okay, maybe I kind of like deer ticks also, [...]

Whynatte stepped up to the streets at our Playground Rivalry Party at Lenny’s Bar on Friday night. The Bands were rocking, the Latte was flowing, and the Squids were squirming. We’ll wet your whistle with a few photos from the event below, with more to come shortly. We would like to extend our [...]

Tonight is music party night at Lenny’s Bar.
Are you proactive? If so, click this link: Proactive Link.
Are you reactive? If so, click this link: Reactive Link

This morning, while debating between jasmine and lavender oil for my weekly full body massage at the hands of my intern, it occurred to me that I have never posted any photos of Abraham Lincoln on this blog.
So, to ameliorate this Abrahamless situation I present you with this little gem (notice the Whynatte hoodie, soon [...]

Match each number in LIST #1 with a definition. There are extra definitions!!! Be careful.
___ 26,631,391
___ 29
___ 42,000 [...]