Incredibly enough, Andy and I managed to do an entire TV interview this morning while still asleep. Check out the video by clicking on this link: Whynatte on CBS Better Mornings.

Anyway, here’s a quick round up of what’s going on this weekend and next, and a few other little tidbits of lactose goodness:

Got a few shows on the calendar, so pick your poison and stock up on lactaid:

1) Friday, March 5th: Noot d’ Noot at the Earl, with Judi Chicago and Rob Wonder. Rumor has it that you’re going to drink a lot of Whynattes at this show. We may even be there to buy them for you. Well, we’ll certainly be there, so you never know what’s possible.

2) Friday, March 5th & Sunday, March 7th: Frank Bell at Smith’s Olde Bar. Check out the video below, and tell me that this guy doesn’t get laid more than anyone you know. Frank’s a great talent, and we’re thankful for the opportunity to help bring him to Smith’s. Also, if you miss him at Smith’s on Friday night, he’ll be playing at Sambuca on Sunday night. Check out Frank’s tour website at www.frankbell.net/tour.

3) Thursday, March 11th: B.o.B aka Bobby Ray at Smith’s Olde Bar. There really isn’t much more to say about this show, aside from the fact that BOB’s live show has made converts out of every single person that’s seen it. Kind of like the first time I power slid a rental Kia through the parking lot of the Civic Center. Cruise over to Ticket Alternative to procure a presale ticket:

Christ, I have a meeting that’s about to start. More posting to come, time to earn those dairy dollars.

Whynatte has a genuine connection to Savannah, in that our company considers itself to have a genuine connection to any town that allows one to legally walk around with an open container of alcohol. That, and Whynatte’s Creative Director aka the man behind all things design is a graduate of Savannah College of Art and Design. But seriously, you can actually purchase your Whynatte cocktail from a Savannah bar, and then proceed to walk outside and pound it on the street corner.

If you happen to be down in Savannah this week, give us a shout and lets meet up for a drink. We’ll be opening about 15-20 new bars this week, and we’ll likely be grilling the proverbial panini each and every night this week.

Also, we’ll keep you updated on which bars in Savannah are carrying the Whynatte:

The result? Well, you’d have to actually try one of Orion’s handcrafted Whynattes to taste the difference, but I can assure you that he didn’t get his esteemed reputation without being one of the best in the world.

Orion wasn’t always the Whynatte craftsman that you see here today. In fact, he started off as one of the more rudimentary baristas that I’ve ever seen enter the trade. His form was pedestrian, and the froth of his milk was sloppier than the mouth of a hunting hyena. He was like a large chunk of uncarved granite, but over the years the slab has been transformed into a sparkly talking pony.

What you don’t see in these photos are the years of training that went into making him what he is today. Like an Olympic athlete who trains for years, waking up at dawn to fine tune even the smallest detail, Orion too spent years waking up at dawn on random people’s sofas, and going to work in the same clothes he’d slept in:

With his reputation for making world class Whynattes come the perks of success. Most notably, hot chicks. Groupies, if you will. The tank-topped slice of brisket that you see in the photo below is just one of the many examples of the kind of roast that Orion now enjoys on a nightly basis:

Once you’re through admiring the sweet haircut, make a note on your day timer to hit The Nook this Saturday night, as the bar will magically be transformed into a New Jersey fantasy land. Maybe we’ll start a big bar fight just to make it feel that much more authentic. Who knows?

What I do know is that it’s going to be a lot of fun, and you really can’t go wrong dressing up as a Guido for a night while getting plastered. Hope to see you there.

For a quick El Bar/Whynatte history lesson, check out this link, or this link, this link, and this link, along with this link, or this link. Okay, good, now you’re up to speed.

You see, Thursday night at El Bar holds a special place in the history of the Whynatte. Back in 2006, long before we had an actual product, we used to host a Thursday night Whynatte night each week at El Bar. What started out as a few friends hanging out with a couple venti lattes, eventually turned into gallons of latte poured from large urns and a packed bar. Back in the day it was truly a scene, with hundreds of people pounding piping hot lattes with ice cold shots of jager dropped into them, and from time to time burning all of the bars furniture in the back parking lot.

As time passed, we realized that we could not sustain the weekly 4am bedtime, and the associated feeling of impending death that came with each Friday morning. The urns were put back into their urn cases, and Thursday night Whynatte night at El Bar went on hiatus.

Until now. Let’s rewind the clock and get back down to business:

Whynatte & PBR are bringing the Constellations to 529 in East Atlanta on February 10th. No doubt it’s going to be a complete and utter shit show, and I mean that in the best possible way:

Fast forward through one of the most exciting interviews of all time, to minute 4 of this clip from Perez Hilton’s site.

Notice anything familiar?

This has nothing to do directly with Whynatte, but it’s still without a doubt the place to be from 7-10 tonight. Greg Mike is a dear friend of ours, and a pretty creative lad to boot. The artwork of Greg Mike opens tonight at the Kai Lin Gallery on Peachtree Rd. No doubt the crowd will be cooler than a popsicle in the butt. Though probably not quite as fun as a popsicle in the butt:

Whynatte donated a bunch of lattes to the fine pupils of Emory University, in an effort to help raise money for the earthquake victims in Haiti. While the Whynatte didn’t quite fetch as much the pot brownies and peyote cookies, I’d still like to think that we made a worthwhile contribution:

As part of our endless search for crappy quality photos taken in dark bars using cellphones, we stumbled upon this little gem from Maggie’s, an upscale martini lounge in Atlanta:

Like a relatively homely woman putting on a slinky evening gown, our white kidnapper van was magically transformed into sexyness on wheels.

We’re going to run a little contest for the readers of the Whynatte Blog. The first 3 people to email or tweet a photo of the Whynatte van driving around Atlanta will win a free case of Whynatte, and a Whynatte shirt. Email the photo to contests@whynatte.com, or make sure you tag @whynatte if you’re claiming your prize via Twitter:

So, the Whynatte van should be cruising the town, and you can win big if you see it and snap a photo. If David Perloe, one of our sales associates, is behind the wheel, look for the Whynatte van parked outside local high schools or any place where hoards of traveling gypsies can be found:

If you find yourself stuck in traffic behind the Whynatte van, at least you’ll have a nice view of the most premium RTD coffee in the world. Show us your appreciation by gently ramming the back of the van - if you ram the van hard enough, who knows, maybe we’ll throw you a free case?

That all changes February 20th. For the first time in the history of pub crawls, Whynatte is going to give you the opportunity to visit multiple bars during the day, and take home a live pelican. If we can’t actually find a pelican to give away, we’ll figure out something else in its place.

This is all taking place under the guise of the 5th Annual Sister’s Pub Crawl. Not to be mistaken with the V-103 For Sister’s Only event, the Sister’s Pub Crawl is a time proven journey through the many bars owned by Tracy Crowley. I know that it’s a over a month out, but we want you to get this one on the calendar now.

A sampling of the bars include: Darkhorse, Limerick, Blind Willies, Standard, U-Joint, Neighbors, Home, Standard, Steinbecks, and others.

Given the roster of bars owned by Mr. Crowley, two things immediately become evident:

1) Mr. Crowley likely drives a nicer car than you or I.
2) This is going to be a good fucking time.

Check out the flyer that Whynatte put together for the event: